Welcome to the memorial page for
Ruth Fahey
December 29, 1917 ~ April 12, 2016 (age 98) 98 Years Old Light a Candle
Leave a Condolence
Message from Victoria Fahey
May 2, 2016 7:51 AM
For my Mother:
I want to thank the people of Sturgeon Bay and Door County who befriended my mother over the past 60 years. I am not sure anyone knows just how much of a gift your love and friendship were to her.
Before moving to Sturgeon Bay in 1955 she was never able to stay in one place long enough to build close friendships. From the time of her marriage until I was 11 years old, my mother had to move to 9 different houses in 6 different cities and 3 states.
And then it changed. I remember when we were living in my great grand parents town, Paw Paw, Michigan, her telling us that we were going to move to a place called Sturgeon Bay, Wisconsin, a place she and my father had loved when they sailed and that it was going to be a place where she wanted to for us to stay and become part of the community. As soon as she got us moved from the Cherryland Motel to our little yellow house on Nautical Drive, she joined the PTA and agreed to be the PTA secretary. She came home from the second meeting and said “I did it! I got up and read the minutes...my voice shook, but I did it!"
You all made her feel so safe and loved that many years later she could stand up in front of the whole congregation wearing red jingling antlers and happily read the Hope Church announcements.
I know she was gifted with a natural joy. You can see it in the photo of her with the flowers. As children, she taught us to love nature, to swim naked at night in Lake Cora and to follow our own paths.
Finally Jim and I and our father left and the family Beagle Captain died, leaving her on her own and without responsibility for others. At first she was lost. But with the help of Phil Sweet and all of you she found her joy again, even going on a canoe trip with bears prowling around the tent at night.
She said she would wake up in the morning with a bit of apprehension and then for the rest of the day she would be simply HAPPY.
Sadly, there was a lot of pain in her life, which she never complained about, from having TB twice before the end of high school...spending the winter on the back porch in Chicago because fresh icy air was thought to be healthy, with only her pet rabbit for company...to losing a kidney shortly after she was married and being told she should not have children. Several miscarriages. Appendectomy, colostomy and her heart valve surgery. I will never forget her pride and joy in all the cards you sent her after her heart surgery. They filled the windowsills and tables and eventually we organized them alphabetically in 3 scrapbooks. Despite the 8 hours of surgery and nicked artery, it was her happiness with the cards you sent that she talked about.
We criticized her for asking others to help her. I often thought she was feigning helplessness, while she was actually very strong. But in reflection…I realized that for 20 years she pretty much raised us alone and did everything herself. Our father was devoted to his work and came home exhausted and wanting to be waited on. So it was all up to her. And she did it. She found us houses, she fed us, she got us to school, and she juggled to money she was given to cover all the expenses of a family of 4 as well as a dog and cat. It took me a long time to realize how hard this must have been for her.
And at last she was taken care of. I have enormous gratitude to the people of Good Samaritan Nursing home and the forces and people who got her there, for taking such good care of her for her last years, so she did not have to do everything for herself and was well fed and loved, amused by Bingo and Whammy and someone helped take off her socks at night.
I was blessed to have her as my mother who gave me the quiet and beauty of the countryside. Who worked for 4 years and used her whole paycheck to send me to college and never restricted me from following the paths I need to explore in my life.
When I visited her 2 years ago, said that my visit was enough and I did not need to come half way around the world once she was gone to say good bye.
With deep gratitude to my unique, quirky mother and to all of you who gave her the love and caring that made her life rich and happy.
Victoria Fahey
I want to thank the people of Sturgeon Bay and Door County who befriended my mother over the past 60 years. I am not sure anyone knows just how much of a gift your love and friendship were to her.
Before moving to Sturgeon Bay in 1955 she was never able to stay in one place long enough to build close friendships. From the time of her marriage until I was 11 years old, my mother had to move to 9 different houses in 6 different cities and 3 states.
And then it changed. I remember when we were living in my great grand parents town, Paw Paw, Michigan, her telling us that we were going to move to a place called Sturgeon Bay, Wisconsin, a place she and my father had loved when they sailed and that it was going to be a place where she wanted to for us to stay and become part of the community. As soon as she got us moved from the Cherryland Motel to our little yellow house on Nautical Drive, she joined the PTA and agreed to be the PTA secretary. She came home from the second meeting and said “I did it! I got up and read the minutes...my voice shook, but I did it!"
You all made her feel so safe and loved that many years later she could stand up in front of the whole congregation wearing red jingling antlers and happily read the Hope Church announcements.
I know she was gifted with a natural joy. You can see it in the photo of her with the flowers. As children, she taught us to love nature, to swim naked at night in Lake Cora and to follow our own paths.
Finally Jim and I and our father left and the family Beagle Captain died, leaving her on her own and without responsibility for others. At first she was lost. But with the help of Phil Sweet and all of you she found her joy again, even going on a canoe trip with bears prowling around the tent at night.
She said she would wake up in the morning with a bit of apprehension and then for the rest of the day she would be simply HAPPY.
Sadly, there was a lot of pain in her life, which she never complained about, from having TB twice before the end of high school...spending the winter on the back porch in Chicago because fresh icy air was thought to be healthy, with only her pet rabbit for company...to losing a kidney shortly after she was married and being told she should not have children. Several miscarriages. Appendectomy, colostomy and her heart valve surgery. I will never forget her pride and joy in all the cards you sent her after her heart surgery. They filled the windowsills and tables and eventually we organized them alphabetically in 3 scrapbooks. Despite the 8 hours of surgery and nicked artery, it was her happiness with the cards you sent that she talked about.
We criticized her for asking others to help her. I often thought she was feigning helplessness, while she was actually very strong. But in reflection…I realized that for 20 years she pretty much raised us alone and did everything herself. Our father was devoted to his work and came home exhausted and wanting to be waited on. So it was all up to her. And she did it. She found us houses, she fed us, she got us to school, and she juggled to money she was given to cover all the expenses of a family of 4 as well as a dog and cat. It took me a long time to realize how hard this must have been for her.
And at last she was taken care of. I have enormous gratitude to the people of Good Samaritan Nursing home and the forces and people who got her there, for taking such good care of her for her last years, so she did not have to do everything for herself and was well fed and loved, amused by Bingo and Whammy and someone helped take off her socks at night.
I was blessed to have her as my mother who gave me the quiet and beauty of the countryside. Who worked for 4 years and used her whole paycheck to send me to college and never restricted me from following the paths I need to explore in my life.
When I visited her 2 years ago, said that my visit was enough and I did not need to come half way around the world once she was gone to say good bye.
With deep gratitude to my unique, quirky mother and to all of you who gave her the love and caring that made her life rich and happy.
Victoria Fahey
A candle was lit by Susan Zeyher
on April 28, 2016 9:52 PM
Message from Sheila Turner
April 26, 2016 9:16 PM
Jay and Victoria you have my deepest sympathy. I have so many memories from the past. Ruth was so resilient. She has left you with many memories.
Message from Nancy Skadden
April 23, 2016 9:14 AM
Ruth was always a cheerful face and voice at Hope Church. We have missed her since she went to Sister Bay.
Message from Shirley Shogren
April 21, 2016 7:59 PM
Goodbye to Ruth, my very best friend ever! On one of my last visits with her in the cottage, I sat there and tapped into all of the life that surrounded her: the ducks in the bay, the birds & chipmunks by the feeders, the fish in the tank, the cat on her lap and memories of her dog, long gone. The evening light reflected from her collection of silver and glass. She was never alone and never without a plan to bring more beauty into her life. I remember her excitement of designing new flower beds to welcome visitors to her door. She well knew she would not get so many visits from her Sturgeon Bay friends when she decided to make her home is Sister Bay – she went there for the natural beauty surrounding Scandia Village. Ruth taught me some very practical life lessons – not the least of which was to always have just water to save money when eating out and to have my wine or mixed drink with friends at home BEFORE “going out”. Her picture hung on my “family wall” for the twenty years I lived in Tucson. Ruth was seldom anything else but smiling and cheerful and ever proactive in keeping Door County the wonderful place it is. She almost made 100 but I don’t think that was a plan – just a consequence of a life well lived!
Message from Dave & Linda Shogren
April 19, 2016 3:40 PM
Dear Jay and Victoria,
I was just thinking about your mom the other day. Ruth was a great family friend and neighbor for many decades. I always enjoyed her energy, spirit and optimism. I remember on Bay Shore Drive having to get a ladder and get Ruth's cat out of the tree because our dog had chased it up the tree :)
So sorry for your loss.
Dave and Linda
I was just thinking about your mom the other day. Ruth was a great family friend and neighbor for many decades. I always enjoyed her energy, spirit and optimism. I remember on Bay Shore Drive having to get a ladder and get Ruth's cat out of the tree because our dog had chased it up the tree :)
So sorry for your loss.
Dave and Linda
© 2024 Huehns Funeral Home & Crematory. All Rights Reserved. Funeral Home website by CFS & TA | Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Accessibility